The Devs They Are A-Changin'

Come gather 'round gamers
Whetever genre you play
And agree the industry
Has been led astray
And foresee D.L.C.
Plus the games turnin' grey
If the games to you
Are worth playin'
Then you better not buy codes for
Any on-disc content.
For the devs they are a-changin'.


Come video game critics
Who give 9.5 outta 10
To keep your wage high
For games I can't play again
But don't crack so soon
For we're all blowin' steam
Oh you see now who
That I'm blamin'
For the indie now
Will be later mainstream
For the devs they are a-changin'.


Come designers, programmers
Please hear our plea
Don't sell out to EA
Just listen to me
'Cause when you get big
Attending E3
You think we'll be at your side
When you're stagin'
You'll see your profits fade
Like your integrity
For the devs they are a-changin'.


Come hardcores and neckbeards
All around the net
And wave the flags high
Of blood and of sweat
For all the casual gamers
Can never understand
The old days are
Rapidly fadin'
Now made in a couple o' days
What was once caref'ly planned.
For the devs they are a-changin'.


The gauntlet is thrown
The players come last
The good dev now
Will become balf-assed
What we must do now
Together stand fast
The industry
Needs some upgradin'
And D.L.C. now
Must become a thing o' the past
For the devs they are a-changin'.

Expand No More

Back in the not-so days of yonder, times not-that long past; we had these delightful things called expansion packs. A while after I'd finish a game, I'd think to myself, "that was a barrel of fun. If only I could continue my adventure in Morrowind as the great hero ToasterBane". As Todd Howard has the ability to read the minds of mere mortals, he listened in and decided he'd bring out an expansion pack. What this was is an extension to the game that added new story, gameplay and adventure. Not quite a sequel, not quite a patch.
Somewhere along the line of the last 5 years or so, it occurred to developers that they could start making more dosh in the form of bite-size updates to games, called DLC. At this point, gaming had long since shifted its focus to consoles as opposed to PC, so expansion packs were becoming more and more rare as the younglings who'd gotten a 360 or PS3 for their birthdays used their pocket money to buy a different coloured gun for their Cowadooty character.
I'm getting ahead of myself. Due to the popularity of bite-size updates, expansion packs were all but deserted in favour of microtransitions; better known as one of many firm but steady kick to the bullocks of the gaming community. No longer could ToasterBane fight the tyranny of toasters for another good 10 hours at least of gameplay, rather he'd fight but a spork for an hour if he's lucky with the purchase of the Spork Add-On Pack for only $12.95. The soul-crushing part is, the likes of Spork Add-On Pack is actually the better side of D.L.C. nowadays. That'll take a post in it's own to get through, mind you.
Now, we stand together peering down into the grave of expansion packs as the final shovel-fulls of dirt are thrown over the casket. The murderer's still at large, everyone has their theories. In the end, it comes down to the ultimate question in the downfall of the gaming industry: is it the fault of the developers, or is it the fault of the players? Is it on their heads because they cut the content, or is it on ours' for watching as it happened?

All that fun you were having was just pretend.

Don't believe me? Follow my ramblings and you'll find out pretty quickly that, all odds are, the games you enjoy are the worst things to grace the Earth since your mother. Or the lizard people, but we don't talk about the lizard people.
ANYWAY. This blog is, in a nutshell, me giving back to the gaming community by keeping you up to date with the latest terrible turn of events in the wide world of vidya! Vidya here being video games, not knowledge. Hey, that's almost ironic when you consider how little sense I'll be making. I kid, of course, I'll be making perfect sense as long as you understand the core concept that I hate fun.
So keep reading, oh dearest stranger, and follow me as I lead you down a blog-based journey showing you everything that is wrong with vidya today. Maybe some good things, too, if we have time.
Probably not though.